When Grief Bleeds

This article first appeared on Franchesca Cox’s blog

Don’t rush.

Don’t be startled.

Don’t try to trick yourself into feeling happy and well again.

In fact, the best thing to do is nothing at all.

Breathe into it.

Exhale, out loud, if you are up for it.

Breathe in freedom.

Exhale the captivity grief seems to put your heart into.

Accept grief as a tool to make you a deeper soul, a more compassionate being, a wanderer and seeker of truths.

If you are in the thick of new grief, accepting feels like a violation to your right as a human being capable of love. Don’t go there. Be gentle on yourself, and breathe. One day at a time.

But if you are a little further out from your loss, these moments of grief “bleeding” out into your everyday life, that at one time seemed so impossible, still – remember to breathe. These moments make you human.

They make you real.

They make you vulnerable.

They also make you capable of anything.

They remind you how intimately you brushed shoulders with death.

They remind you how you have survived, and not only that but you have thrived.

Give your soul these moments to bleed out.

The vortex of grief demands your heart and soul from time to time. Grief is the cost of love, and one we pay so willingly.

Be okay with wherever these moments take you.

You will resurface again.

Stronger, better, braver.

// G I V E A W A Y //

When the original blog post was written wrestled in my heart for days, and the aftermath was a series of workshops for grieving mothers. Facets of Grief is the new website where grieving mothers can find monthly creative tools to navigate life after loss, honor their child’s memory and do it all at their own pace. This online workshop is full of inspiration, mindful healing at your own pace, art, quotes, freebies and tools to carry with you to nurture your grief and find out what healing looks like for you. I am giving away one year memberships to five people – each a $179 value.

To enter hop over to my facebook page to enter, or enter on Facets of Grief Instagram page.

G I V E A W A Y — My vision for this project started over a year ago, when I began writing the 30+ workshops for Choosing Your Breath. It started right around the time I wrote a blog post titled “When Grief Bleeds”. I knew I wanted to use creativity somehow to make SOMETHING to help grieving mothers. To make art and creativity and healing accessible. And by healing, I don’t mean better, or sudden happiness or a gigantic eraser to make all the pain and emptiness disappear. Healing in the context of losing a child is simply taking control of your own wellness again. That can include joy, it can include laughter, it can include a lot of things, but it doesn’t have to. Grief and healing are as unique as our own thumbprints. There is no right or wrong way to do grief. And by extension there is not right or wrong way to heal. Healing here isn’t the goal, that word feels like such a violation in early grief. Facets of grief exists to help grieving mothers navigate grief after losing a child. To introduce to them tools and activities that can nurture grief and healing through intentional grief work. It is a creative oasis for grieving mothers and acts like a buffet, with things that can nurture your grieving heart with 24/7 access to all of the materials. It will include all of my workshops, which you will receive on a weekly basis, and many more grief tools: Yoga Classes for Grieving Mothers, Meditations, Art Therapy Videos, Talks, Writing Prompts, discount on shop prints & books, and free hand drawn coloring pages. It is basically my Choosing Your Breath workshops on steroids! It is going to be self-paced, so you are not overwhelmed with all the material at once. Every Sunday evening you will receive an email with new content that you can sift through to see if anything speaks to you. Now for the GIVEAWAY! To enter, tag 3 people that you think might be need this. If you win, all three of them win too! Five winners will be randomly selected… so when it’s all said and done there will be 20 winners!

A photo posted by Facets of Grief (@facetsofgrief) on Jun 1, 2016 at 7:54pm PDT

Franchesca Cox

Franchesca Cox is the founder of Still Standing Magazine. She is currently seeking her Master’s in Occupational Therapy, a yogi and author of Celebrating Pregnancy Again and Facets of Grief, a creative workbook for grieving mothers. Learn more about her heartwork on her website.

franchescacox.com