• A Missing Piece

    April 18, 2017

    My mother’s ring is one of my favorite pieces of jewelry. A gift from my husband, years ago when our boys were still young. It was a surprise for many reasons, one being that it came on ordinary day, not a special occasion. The other because I knew he had to pre-order, so it wasn’t…

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  • Stone Cold

    March 21, 2017

    There is no comfort here. There never has been. No matter the decorations brought or flower arrangements designed around this stone, it is cold, lonely and sad.       A reminder of loss.  Tangible-punch you in the throat-proof that our son is gone. Forever. Such stress there was in choosing his headstone and plot.  What…

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  • Small Talk

    February 21, 2017

    When you’ve lost a child, starting conversations with someone new can be difficult. In the beginning of your loss, small talk can even feel overwhelming because you are on constant guard to avoid the inevitable question. “How many kids do you have?” Nearly nine years later what I can share is that it never gets…

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  • Time Marches On

    January 17, 2017

    This morning, someone asked me to pray for a woman who recently lost her husband. The loss happened right before the holidays but the past few weeks have seem to hit her the hardest.  The busyness of the season somehow helped, or at least paused the pain.  Though I’m sure not having her husband with…

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  • Tree of Hope

    December 20, 2016

    We planted a memorial tree in our yard on Austin’s first birthday in Heaven, July 8, 2009. He would’ve been 15 that year. I don’t remember what type it was but I specifically picked it because it bloomed in the summer. The tree is planted directly in front of Austin’s bedroom window and in our…

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  • The Truth Is…

    November 15, 2016

    “Will it always hurt like this?” Those words, my husband asked in shaky breath, as we stood by our son’s casket. He was looking into the eyes of another child loss couple, who’d lost their daughter years and years before. A silent pause. They looked at each other, toward us, to the floor. No words.…

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  • Pieces of Him

    October 18, 2016

    We had family pictures taken yesterday. This is only the second time in the eight years since he’s been gone we’ve done so, at least professionally. Though his absence is always with us, on occasions like this the longing to have him here is even greater. For our first photo session, the pain was still very…

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