In child loss, milestones are sharp knives to your heart. A reminder of what didn’t get to be. Each life event makes the absence greater because you wonder what it would have been like if they were here. And so, this was not just another graduation; it was another milestone in loss. Milestones those first…
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Dia de Muertos – Celebrating the Dead
Continue...My family recently watched the Disney movie, Coco, and the main theme has me pondering on the differences of death among cultures. In the movie, the primary character learns of the importance of Dia de Muertos, or “Day of the Dead” and the significance it has for his family. From Wikipedia, “The Day of the Dead…
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A Lasting Impression
Continue...There is a memorial sticker on the back of my car window. We’ve changed vehicles a few times in the past decade, since losing our firstborn, but the stickers remain. Before we lost a child, I said I’d never get one. I recall my husband and I had a conversation in a parking lot once…
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I Did Not Send My Child To School Today
Continue...Our high school received a shooting threat this week. A one-sentence note scribbled on a bathroom stall that sent kids and parents into varied states of fear. And although school authorities immediately began work to check the validity, security was upped, and a message was sent to ease our worries, for this mom it was…
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When Grief Surprises You
Continue...Grief hit me hard this year on my birthday. Unexpected grief is always the hardest to handle because it is a surprise. When anniversaries or special occasions appear on the calendar, I can brace myself, somewhat prepare for what I expect will come. The date gives me permission to sink and release. When it’s unplanned,…
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A Decade of New Year Grief
Continue...Starting a new year after losing our son in 2008 seemed inconceivable. How could we move forward without him, knowing he would be missing from 365 days of that year? Though it has been a decade now, each January, when the calendar turns I am taken back to that first year without him. Below are…
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Why I’ll Never Get Over Losing Him
Continue...Shortly after our loss, my husband and I attended a support group (Compassionate Friends). It was the first and last time we would go together. What shocked us, and turned my husband away from finding hope there, was hearing story after story of loss, but realizing they were years into their grief. Decades. We couldn’t…