A Bereaved Parent’s Battle Cry

I’m tired… tired of having to hide how I am truly feeling from the rest of the world.

Tired of having to put on a fake smile every time I go to work or a social event, so people around me will think I’m doing better.

Tired of wanting to post something about MY CHILD – yet I don’t because people are “tired of seeing that.”

So I hide.

I hide and post in one of my bereaved parent groups because that is the only place “I feel safe enough to show my real feelings and won’t be judged.”

Why the hell should I have to hide my feelings about my child?!

Do others have to hide their feelings about their children?

Do other parents have to watch “how many times” they post about their son or their daughter’s soccer games or recitals or first steps or proms or births –

or anything that they rejoice in?

Please Know: I Love Talking About My Child Who Died

No – you know why?

Because other people will rejoice with them!

They are not looking for pats on the back because they are that child’s parent.

They are proud of their children.

PERIOD!

So why…

WHY IS IT DIFFERENT FOR BEREAVED PARENTS?

We don’t have future proms…

or recitals…

or births…

or first steps.

We have memories.

That.is.it!

We post about our children because… we are proud of them just like any other parent.

We want people to support our memories with the same encouragement with which they used to support our accomplishments and milestones when our children still lived!

Say our child’s name!

Share a memory to our page of that child!

Rejoice with us!

Please Don’t Forget About My Child

And on those hard days when we post that we miss our child, and we say we can’t go on, whether it is two months or 10 years later –

please understand, we are not looking for a pat on the back or sympathy.

We want you to remember that child with us!

Please…

Memories are all we have left…

——-

About the Author: Anna Nalepka is an award-winning actress, and mother to 4 beautiful children, three here one angel in Heaven. She is doing a Documentary on the grief of losing a child called “Broken… But Still Here” A Journey through Child Loss and Beyond.

Originally published here.