Blog post

The Weight of Three Pounds

April 14, 2018

The weight of three pounds

I know it exactly.

Remembered by my body,

Engrained in the crook of my left arm

Where I held him for four hours

Before saying goodbye.


I carefully cradled his fragile body,

Even though I knew I couldn’t hurt him anymore.

Supporting his head like any mother would

With any newborn, breathing or not.


My body remembers the weight of his three pounds precisely.

I can conjure up the feeling at any moment.

It is all I have left of him physically

Always there, always resting.

Three tiny pounds (and one ounce) peacefully placed in my empty left arm

Carried with me every day, everywhere.

Photo by: Allef Vinicius/Unsplash

  • Tara Rigg

    Tara Rigg writes about the complexities, joys, and misunderstanding that surround infertility and grief. Her son, Beau, was stillborn in 2014. She gratefully breathes in the mountain air surrounding her home in Bozeman, MT where she lives with her husband and three young daughters. Find more at

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