• “You’ll have your baby some day!”

    September 28, 2016

    In the infertility world, there are things that every infertile cringes at hearing. “Just relax!!” “Go on vacation, you’ll come back pregnant” “Just adopt, my hairdressers husbands cousins teacher adopted and 3 months later she found out she was pregnant!” We have all heard those in one form or another more times than we ever…

    Continue...
  • What This Feels Like…

    September 28, 2016

    This. It’s horrible. It’s heartbreaking. It has brought me to more tears and to my knees more in the last week than I have been in the last year. Watching, begging and praying. For someone else’s baby to live.   I obviously know what it feels like to do that for my own babies.  To…

    Continue...
  • Grief with a Heaping Side of Guilt

    September 28, 2016

    It’s so easy to shut life out in the midst of deep grief.  It’s so difficult, if not impossible at times, to let life in. I remember the first time I laughed out loud after my son died.  The onslaught of immediate guilt I felt shocked me more than the laugh itself.  In that fleeting…

    Continue...
  • Grief Blooming

    September 28, 2016

    This time of the year is my season. I am yearning for summer, when all this will be behind me again. But today, I’m feeling it. The weight. The heaviness. The scar. The cloud of grief. It’s always there, but this time of year, I’ve come to learn over the years, it becomes raw again.…

    Continue...
  • Please Don’t Forget About My Child

    September 28, 2016

    [media-credit name=”Jessi Snapp – Luminous Light Studio” align=”aligncenter” width=”707″][/media-credit] Please, don’t forget about my child. This is my heartfelt plea. I know you love and care about my family. I know that you don’t always understand nor do I expect you to. I know that you wouldn’t want to cause more pain to our already…

    Continue...
  • Dealing with Seasons of Withdrawals and Grief

    September 22, 2016

    Writing this month has been by far the most challenging for me.  I am currently on the “withdrawal list” from life around me.  Even posting to Facebook, Twitter, or any other social media site has been unwelcomed by this time in my life.  I want it to all go away.  Or I will go away…

    Continue...
  • What I need

    September 22, 2016

    I have never been good at telling others what I need. Losing my daughter complicated my ability to ask for help rather than sharpening it. If I could have given myself one thing to get me through, when I stopped answering the phone and hoped no one would stop by, it would have been a…

    Continue...
1 2 3 10