Who is a grieving mother? Does she look different from one who is not?
Is her pain visible in the smile she sometimes forces…
behind the eyes on the verge of tears?
Can you see the aging her body feels from the trauma of loss?
She’s one who still pictures herself from before the loss
and is sometimes caught off guard at the reflection looking back from the mirror.
Who is a grieving mother?
She’s one who ignores a baby shower or birthday invitation one day
because the pain is still too raw.
Related: Baby Shower After Loss or Infertility: Handling the Happiest Invitation at the Saddest Time
And the next, celebrates the small milestones, for she knows how precious they are.
She’s one who boxes up a lifetime of mementos in an afternoon
to spare her husband the pain.
Yet years later still can’t dredge up the courage to go through them again.
Who is a grieving mother?
She’s one who holds it together in the big things and falls apart over spilled milk.
Who loves deeply those closest to her, but keeps her heart guarded for protection from others.
She’s one who grimaces at the first laughs after loss but later laughs louder than most.
Who finds joy in simple things and relishes everyday moments.
Who is a grieving mother?
She’s one held hostage by dates on the calendar and unexpected triggers.
And one who will always pause for sunsets, butterflies, and sweet signs from above.
Related: My Son Died, But He Is Still Here
She’s one who lets go of friends unable to support her.
And one who treasures those who didn’t walk away.
Who is a grieving mother?
She’s one who can experience an array of emotions on any given day.
And one who wishes tears would come when numbness covers her.
She’s one who screams at God one moment and clings to him the next.
Who didn’t expect her faith to grow so much
from the most critical unanswered prayer she ever spoke.
Who is a grieving mother?
She is one as complicated as the grief she carries.
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“Do not judge the Grieving Mother. She comes in many forms. She is breathing, but she is dying. She may look young, but inside she has become ancient. She smiles, but her heart sobs. She walks, she talks, she cooks, she cleans, she works, she IS but she IS NOT, all at once. She is here, but part of her is elsewhere for eternity.”
~ Author Unknown
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Photo by Anthony Tran on Unsplash
In 2008, my world as I knew it changed forever, with the sudden loss of our 14-year-old son, Austin. The journey to my blog (and attitude toward life) was bumpy and tearful, beginning at a memorial blog for my son. I later chose to take another path, challenging myself to find the JOY in every day, despite the sadness I still felt. I love and miss him daily but I’m living my life to honor him – and celebrating every moment it brings. My goal…to find and share the joy in every day. You can find me at Joyful Challenge
Kerry Isman says
After 9 years without my son, I still could hardly read this. I have never read anything that completely and fully describes how it feels. Wish I had a copy of it
Beth says
At the very top of the article is a tab to “print” this in pdf format.
Susan Langley says
My son died Jan 1, 2014. I feel just like this woman this article speaks of. I feel I am dying in side no matter how I try and keep umy “happy face.”