Guest post by Kayla Smith
I sit here nearly two months into this journey and ask myself the very question I dreaded others asking me, how am I doing? I immediately tell myself I’m terrible. I’m not making any progress. I’m at a standstill. I feel as if a pause button has been hit on my life while everybody around me seems to be on fast forward. My son Hunter was born still on April 30, 2013. For the 40 weeks he grew inside of me he changed me in so many positive ways. While I have spent the first few months surrounding myself with all the negatives, I can now start to see the positive effect Hunter has had on my life.
Because of you I am stronger than I ever imagined I could be.
Because of you I can accept any challenge that I am faced with.
Because of you I have the strength to get through anything.
Because of you I have learned to have faith.
Because of you our family has grown closer.
Because of you I will no longer live my life as if it’s a timetable, I can’t control it.
Because of you I have made new lifelong friends, we share the same pain, but were united by you.
Because of you I know how it feels to truly love someone.
Because of you I am never alone.
Because of you I found a new me.
Because of you my life is forever changed.
Because of you he is a father.
Because of you I am a mom.
In the early weeks of grief when I was asked how I was doing I would always answer honestly and tell them I was terrible. But ask me how I’m doing today and I’ll tell you the truth, I’m doing a lot better, because of him.