There are days when I want to compile a giant list of all the ways I’ve been wronged and carry it around with me. As soon as I hear someone laughing or celebrating, I want to stop, show them my list and say, “I’m so glad YOU are happy because MY BABIES DIED.” This feeling,…
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Inviting Grief To Dinner
Continue...If you’re anything like me, certain dates haunt you. Your due-date, for example, or the day you got that positive pregnancy test. Admittedly, after 9 years, some of them are actually starting to dissolve, turn back into just regular dates on the calendar, as if there was nothing of note on those days. Then there…
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Healing Is Every Day Work
Continue...Someone recently asked me, “After all this time, and all the writing and speaking you’ve done about the twins, does it still hurt just as badly to talk about it?” I had to think long and hard before I answered. As with most things, there wasn’t really a yes or no answer for this. “Grief…
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If I Don’t Remember Them, who Will?
Continue...“Who knows. Maybe everybody’s end isn’t the day they actually die, but the last time anyone speaks of them. Maybe when you die you don’t really disappear, but you fade into a shadow, dark and featureless, only your outlines visible.” ― Ali Benjamin, The Thing About Jellyfish In April, my twins, Sophie and Aiden, will…
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- Memories
- Paying it Forward
- Relationships
- Supporting a Friend After Loss
- Supporting a Friend Through Loss
- Twins / Twinless Twins
- Writing for Healing
Generations of Healing
Continue...I had just barely survived my 1st year of grief when I stumbled across Sarita’s blog. Months of typing “My babies died” into a google search had catapulted me into the world of blogging where I found solace, support, and friendship. Sarita’s blog was different, though. Most of the women I had connected with through…
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Know Yourself
Continue...I live in Wisconsin-the state known for milk, brats, and, of course, beer. We are the home of Miller Lite, folks. You can buy an alcoholic beverage practically anywhere. Heck, we throw out bloody-mary mixes at parades and have festivals devoted to wine and beer. I guess you could say that we have a distinct…
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In short, this was all my fault
Continue...I knew I shouldn’t have moved those tables all by myself for the potluck at school. I knew I shouldn’t have been working out at the gym when the walking gave me side pains. Mostly, though, I knew something had been wrong the week before when I had gone to the bathroom and seen some…