Expecting A Rainbow

August 16, 2013

Three years ago, I was in hell.  I had just given birth to my stillborn daughter, Amelia, and became pregnant two months later with my first rainbow baby.   I quickly realized that the thrill of pregnancy was forever changed into an experience full of fear.  I can only compare it to walking on a tightrope over hell and hoping you don’t fall in.  I just wanted to make it to the other side of my pregnancy . . . that happy ending place where I got to hear my baby crying after delivery instead of the awful silence only filled with my own cries.

I desperately missed the happiness ~ the anticipation of meeting this new little baby.  All I could manage was a luke-warm hope that this baby would live.  I needed a place to unveil my fears and feelings so that I could begin to bond without judgement to this new life.  I craved a place where I could talk about Amelia (whom I was still very much grieving) while still trying to navigate an entirely different pregnancy.  I needed a very special journal, so I created one.

“Expecting a Rainbow ~ a journal especially designed for pregnancy after loss” is the compilation of my own needs, grief work, and my training as a mental health professional.  I worked hard to create something that is missing in the world right now . . . a journal that helps break the silence of child loss and embraces the reality of pregnancy after loss.

I never thought I would find that happiness again, but choosing to create art and my writing have helped me in ways I would have never believed possible.  I encourage you to find that special something ~ that spark that helps you reach for hope again.  Because everyone deserves their rainbow ~ their beauty within that storm.

Here is a peek at some of the pages inside.  Designing this journal was really a beautiful experience and a testament to my children . . . all of them.  If you would like to know more about this journal or how you can use one, just click here.

Rainbow Journal WM1 Rainbow Journal WM2 Rainbow Journal WM4 Rainbow Journal WM5 Rainbow Journal WM6 Rainbow Journal WM7 Rainbow Journal WM8 Rainbow Journal WM9 Rainbow Journal WM10 Rainbow Journal WM11 Rainbow Journal WM12 Rainbow Journal WM13 Rainbow Journal WM14

  • Stephanie

    Stephanie Dyer, a mother of five children with four who walk on earth and one who soars, spends her days homeschooling and her nights painting. She has used her years of training and counseling as a LMSW-ACP to help her children deal with the loss of their sister. A self-taught artist, Stephanie currently owns and operates Beyond Words Designs, the company through which she publishes her artistry and runs the Donate Art project, a charity begun in honor of her daughter Amelia.


    • Megan hall

      December 7, 2017 at 4:06 pm

      I would really love to get this book! I lost my little girl elena in march at 25 weeks after trying 3 years and surprisingly a bigger miracle happend when i got pregnant with my little boy in august and is growing so healthy and perfect, this would be perfect to write into for both my babies!

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